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Fat Sex & Intimacy

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Alright, babes we’re going to get right into this fat sex thing… and hopefully it’ll help get you into it too KNOW WHAT I MEAN?!?!?

Let’s start with this – all bodies. ALL BODIES. Have differing needs. We’re going to talk about fat bodies in this article, but let it be known that fat bodies are in no way abnormal or weird. It is 100% normal to make accommodations for ALL bodies. So we’re not going to be hating our bodies or feeling like there’s something wrong with us. This isn’t about that. It’s about knowing that accessibility is valid and you’re worthy of it!

You’re going to have to communicate

I’m not saying it’s easy, in fact I kind of hate this part of relationships. But I can answer 99% of every fat sex question I get with this answer. You’ve got to communicate. Seriously. If something is uncomfortable for you, say so. And when someone tells you something isn’t working for them don’t let your ego get in the way – think of solutions.

You don’t need to have a deep connection with someone to be able to tell them that it’s ok to move your flesh around. If you’re having sex with them, they know what your body looks like. Help them out, give your lover some hints, and let them know what feels good.

Hygiene Concerns

Everyone some times gets scared that they’re going to smell funny. The amount of cruel jokes about fat people being smelly probably aren’t helping plus size babes have great fat sex. But here’s the deal – bodies are odorous. Your is. Mine is. And so is everyone else’s. Unless you’re fresh out of the shower (which could be great foreplay!), there’s a chance you’ll be ripe. That’s ok.

I don’t generally support the use of flushable wipes because it turns out they’re terrible for the environment. However, they’re a great way to feel ready for a romp at any moment. No need to get fancy scented ones. Unscented are great and will get rid of any funk you might be afraid of. I also love the MegaBabe products and use a swipe of thigh rescue on my bikini line and under my breasts to keep me fresh and friction free.

If you need more info on fat hygiene check out ComfyFat’s post. There’s tons of info on accessible ways to make sure your’e always feeling fresh!

Make It Accessible

Set a chair next to the edge of the bed, use pillows to support yourself, buy sex toys!

Nothing is off limits when it comes to accessibility. While I could tell you a million ways that my partner and I make it work, it will ultimately be up to you and whoever you’re having sex with to talk about what works for you.

A few really important items that I think are essential for fat couples are a vibrating wand, a wedge pillow, and a plus size harness. Ya’ll – the world is your oyster when it comes to toys. Spend some time on a couple sites and see what they have to offer! And if you’re looking for reviews, check out the video below. I answer a couple more questions and show off a few toys!

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Tuesday 18th of January 2022

Hi Corissa,

I recently found your blog and so grateful I did! I have hated who I am because of my body my entire life. All I have ever wanted was to be happy and to be (feel) loved for the me I am right here right now. It's a constant battle in my head. I overthink everything. I don't feel like I can be open with my family about anything in my life. I'm afraid to talk, ask questions, share and get advice because I don't want to be ridiculed or hurt for my feelings. So most of the time I'm stuck in my head. I used to feel trapped and thought my only way out and for peace was death. I grew up feeling like I was an embarrassment to my family. I still feel that way. I was fat. I felt bad because I was fat. Like being fat disqualified me from life. I never learned how to drive. I wish I was the same kid that had no fear. Taught myself how to ride a bike. Dared to climb an extension ladder to the second floor balcony of my room. Somewhere I gave up on me. I listened to all the bullshit of who they said I couldn't be and believed it. I think I have met someone, but I'm afraid to 100% believe and trust. I want to put all my inhibitions aside and just enjoy the moment when we meet next week. I tell myself if he comes you can get to know him. If he doesn't well then at least I will know. I do worry about hygiene. I don't want to smell. In the past I always shower before I meet someone just so I'm sure I'm clean. It's been a long while. In my mid 20's I wanted to know if I could be loved by anyone. I was naive confusing sex with love. I hate what society teaches us about our worth as people. It makes me sad. I never wanted kids although I love kids, because I didn't want them to feel like me. Thank you for your blog.


Tuesday 1st of February 2022

@Marilyn, thank you for opening up and putting words to what you feel, that alone helps. I think if we acknowledge our feelings then it will help us figure out what we want and what we can do to put things together. It opens the path for better days. Tell yourself what you think you deserve and embrace it. If you think you deserve a love that is true and does not judge or humiliate and stand for it. Seek for it. If you love kids, dont be afraid to have one. Believe that you are capable to share the love and care that you have. Kids just need love and time. Everything will fall into place. Always remember that you are in the best place you can ever be. You are young, everyday is a chance to be hopeful and do something that you love. Happiness is within. Delight in small things and appreciate even just walking under the sun, feel its warmth. Prayers to you❤️